Dear Miss Attitude (part 2)

So here's the update the reader I told you about yesterday.

Hi Miss Attitude,

So I bit the bullet and asked Nick out on a date, rather than continuing to wait for him to ask me out. We set a breakfast date, as we are both really busy and it seemed that that was the only time both of our schedules would correspond.

The breakfast was wonderful. As usual, we had tons to talk about, plus there was great chemistry between the both of us. When I am around him or talking to him, I just can't wipe the smile off my face. It is so cheesy. At the end of the date, he was a complete gentleman, as usual. He walked me to my car, gave me a hug and gave me two kisses on my cheek.

That was on Sunday. I have not talked to him since and we haven't set a third date. He keeps saying how interested in me he is, but yet he doesn't take the initiative to pursue me. I know he is really really busy with work and school. School seems to be consuming him right now. And I want to be patient and not pushy. But I don't want to be waiting around being dangled on a string either.

I think part of it is he is very much out of practice. He is a very handsome and successful guy. But he hasn't had a real relationship for 6-7 years now. He hasn't hardly dated in that time period at all either. It's like his career has always come first, so I think he is still in that pattern, no matter how much he says he is ready to meet the right someone.

So do you think I just need to chill out? Or how can I get him to put a little more effort into the dating game?

Dear Reader:
I've been giving a lot of thought to your e-mail and the best advice I can give you is, and forgive the cliché, don't put all of your eggs in one basket. I'm very proud of you for asking him out instead of waiting for him. That takes guts and it sounds like you had a great time.

Now speaking from personal experience when you start making excuses for a man, whether it's how busy he is or he hasn't had a serious relationship, you're really making those excuses to make yourself feel better. That being said, I'm not saying you should give up just yet. I am simply saying you shouldn't sit around and wait for him. You should get out and date more, or if you're not ready, stay busy with your friends.

It is still okay to ask him out again without being too pushy. But unfortunately, you can't really make a man put more effort into the dating game if he doesn't want to, despite what The Rules say. You also need to be honest with yourself. If you're willing to wait a little longer to see if he's willing to make some more time, than go for it. If it's going to drive you crazy, then maybe you need to back off and see if he comes around all on his own. I can't make that decision for you. Remember you deserve someone who wants to be with you.

Hi Miss Attitude,

You are so right!! I am making excuses for him. And even though the times we had been on dates were great, if he isn't ready or willing to give me what I want, I need to move on. I have often times given that exact same advice to my friends. I guess I just needed to hear it from someone else this time.

We will just see how it goes, but I am not going to continue to wait around for him. If it is supposed to happen, he will make it happen. :)

I'll keep you posted on what happens with her and Nick. And don't forget if you need advice I want to hear from you. You can e-mail me at missattitude@missattitude.us. Don't forget you will remain anonymous.

Stylishly yours,
Miss Attitude