Do boys call anymore?

Here's what I want to know, do boys bother to call you anymore? Or do they really think texting is the only way to communicate? A few months ago, I ran into a boy I used to work with several years ago. For some bizarre reason it seemed like we were both interested in each other now, when it had never really been an option or possibility before. Okay, maybe it's not so bizarre. He's very cute and a lot of fun. He was married and I used to be his boss. Guess that's why. Anyway, after an exchange of phone numbers and text messages it seemed to me like we would never actually get together in person. And while frustrating, I'm not going to beg a boy to ask me out to dinner. Then a few weeks ago, while in Key West with my friends, I received a text message from him on a Saturday night. "What are you doing?" it read. I didn't respond.

Here's the deal. I was out with my friends. And honestly what was the point of responding? I hadn't heard from him for weeks prior to that and the last time when I actually (gasp) tried calling he only texted back. So I figure ignoring it was my best bet. Then while on vacation in Ocean City, MD one of my friends sent me an e-mail saying he was asking her about me. He told her he'd been trying to get in touch with me for some time now to have dinner and our schedules never match up, etc. He mentioned the ignored text and asked if I was mad at him. She told him she didn't think so and that I was out of town for the week. Then the following day he told her he'd checked out Miss Attitude and wanted to know what the blog was all about. I'm not sure why I'm telling you this part, except I guess to recognize it's possible he's going to read this blog entry so I'm choosing my words carefully!

Anyway, more than a week later I still hadn't heard from him. I knew I should just let it go. But the attitude in me just couldn't, so I e-mailed him. (Wait, before you criticize me for e-mailing and not calling, I have to confess I no longer had his phone number.) Within a few hours, he e-mailed me back with an included "I figured you were mad at me." And still no invitation for dinner. I don't know why I expected anything different. It's obvious this just isn't going to pan out. So the answer my friend is no, I'm not mad at you. I'm just no longer interested in playing the game. If you ever want to go out to dinner, I'd love to go. All you have to do is call me and ask.

Stylishly yours,
Miss Attitude

Dating deal breakers

A couple weeks ago a guy I'd been hanging out with walked into my condo wearing Crocs and a camouflage hat. I was stunned. Speechless. Anyone who knows me knows me, or anyone who's read my blog enough, knows I simply can NOT tolerate fashion no nos like that. Now before you're too quick to judge me for saying that's a deal breaker, I want to disclose he proceeded to talk about hunting and I think what they call "Muddin!" Yikes! All deal breakers.

I've been thinking a lot about dating deal breakers. Some people who know me will say I'm too picky. But my close friends will tell you it's really more about refusing to settle. After all, I've ignored some deal breakers and kept dating some less than appropriate men because I didn't want to write them off too quickly. Let's see there was the guy with the unibrow, the nearly 40 year old who still slept in a twin bed (!), the guy who had the same toothbrush for 13 years (could I really make that up??), and the list goes on.

So I began to wonder what other people's ideas of deal breakers are. I asked around online this week and here are some of the responses I got:

Can't deal with smokers or people that don't care about their bodies.

Too many to list, im picky! Right off the top, promiscuousness, inability to communicate, no job

a nose ring

mine are very simple. Cheaters. and...baggage in bed.

just emotional/intimacy issues in general, both big time deal breakers.

it would be teeth. When you can tell someone doesn't brush. Sickening.

asking to go dutch on the date. You pay or I pay; I hate the dutchness.

men that display ANY KIND of temper on the 1st date

if he is full of himself, then I'll pass.

someone who talks about themselves too much and doesn't ask about me

bad gas and facial hair

bad teeth/bad breath/bad manners

So what are your deal breakers? Inquiring minds want to know...

Stylishly yours,
Miss Attitude

Am I jinxing myself?

Do you ever feel like you're tempting fate by getting too excited about something? Well, I do. I don't consider myself a hugely superstitious person, but sometimes I really think I jinx myself. For years I've felt that it's best not to talk about anything until it's a done deal. And whenever I don't follow my gut about that, I usually don't get what I want. So that has me asking, is it possible to jinx yourself or was it just not meant to be?



When it comes to dating, I've always tried not to talk about a guy I'm interested in until I know it's going somewhere. When you get too interested too soon, you wind up having to tell everyone it didn't work out. Or when you think he's about to take you on a romantic date, you rush out and buy a new outfit only to learn a short time later he's cancelled. So now the feeling is magnified when it comes to the job search.

I know everyone means well when they call right after one of my job interviews to see how it went. I know they're just being supportive. But quite frankly I don't like talk about it over and over. I don't want to get my hopes up or jinx myself. In the past three months I've probably only interviewed for a couple of jobs I actually wanted. But after each interview, I left with a feeling of incompleteness. During the course of my career, I've always known when I nailed a job interview and the interviewer is going to hire me. At my last job, my boss offered me the position right in her office during the middle of the interview. So I'm a pretty confident person. And intellectually I know that talking about how an interview went didn't lose me the job, I really never had it to begin with.

But still, there's just something about the feeling I can't explain. Maybe it's not actually an issue of jinxing myself, but of convincing myself my gut feeling isn't accurate. Because in all of these interviews my gut feeling was I didn't get the job, despite the fact that I was extremely qualified. So I think I'm going to learn to keep more of this process to myself. It's not that I'm not interested in sharing or that I want to hurt any of my friend's or family member's feelings. I just need to do this for myself. Besides it really is difficult enough to be unemployed as it is without worry about explaining yourself to everyone else.

Stylishly yours,
Miss Attitude